Julia Roberts brings star power to surreal 'Mirror Mirror'

Jan Thijs/AP/Relativity MediaRoberts as the queen.

Once upon a time, a very long time ago in the magical Wood of Holly, lived a fabulous Queen named Julia.

She ruled her kingdom for many years and wore many masks. She was a pretty woman and a runaway bride, and a guest at her best friends wedding. She even won a small golden statue for playing a woman named Erin (or maybe just for wearing that painful push-up bra).

But then an evil spell came over Queen Julia. And there was a dark decade of duplicity, and eating praying and loving, and dallying with knaves named Charlie Wilson and Larry Crowne. And her magical cackle was stilled, and her courtiers lamented.

But now that spell has been lifted, for there is Mirror Mirror, a new version of Snow White. And guess who plays the Evil Queen?

No, not Nathan Lane. Please. (Although that would have been wonderful.) He plays her manservant. Queen Julia plays the Evil Queen, and she is vain and brittle, and imperious and rather pleased with herself. And if it is not a role she was born to play, it is one she has convincingly grown into.

In this version of the tale, it is the Evil Queens story, or so she thinks. Snow White is a mere inconvenience, a young maiden played by Lily Collins who has been locked away in her tower bedroom, forgotten by all, left to do nothing but sigh and comb her eyebrow! s.

But one day, Snow White is sent from the castle. And that is when the real magic happens.

Because then we meet the seven dwarves, who are not Sleepy and Sneezy and Doc, but real characters called Half Pint and Butcher and Grub, who rule the forest like Robin Hoods mini men and if you asked them to sing Heigh-Ho would probably punch you in the loins.

And we are introduced to Armie Hammer, who is as slightly fussy and formal as ever, but at least looks like a charming prince. And we see the lovely visuals of director Tarsem Singh, who last made the movie Immortals, in which Mickey Rourke wore a lobster claw on his head, but here puts his strange imagination to better use.

And so we get marionette monsters and royal masques, talking mirrors and enchanted cockroaches. We get stilts that collapse like bellows, love potions that turn men into the wrong kind of beasts and a Bollywood dance number for no reason at all. And we get the glorious, extravagant costume designs of the late Eiko Ishioka.

Of course, things could be a little more magical at the castle.

True, Queen Julia is good, but her wickedness lacks wit; for someone known for her smile, shes never showed a real sense of humor. The Evil Queen should be a poisoned bonbon, a chocolate cherry with a cyanide center. Julia is believably nasty, but never deliciously so.

However, the dwarves provide wonderful fun, Singhs visuals have true magic and Alan Menkens score is charming. And if that PG rating keeps us from having a truly satisfying ending, at least in the end, the evil are punished, the not-quite-so-evil are redeemed, the good are rewarded and everyone lives sappily ever after.

Which makes it a story for children, perhaps. But also a small welcome treat for the weary adults accompanying them.

Ratings note: The film contains violence.

'Mirror Mirror'
(PG) Relativity (95 min.)

Directed by Tarsem Singh. With Julia Roberts, Lily Collins, Armie Hammer, Nathan Lane.!

< em>THREE STARS